I have finally been able to see you for what you really are and I've come to this conclusion: We're not good for each other.
The only reason I've kept you around for so long was for sentimental reasons. We've had some great times together, and you've been there for me through some of my worst times, too.
But enough is enough.
Don't try to change my mind - I'm moving on to bigger and better donuts, and you can't stop me.
I'm only going to say this once and then it's over... you make my teeth feel like they are wearing a sweater. I'm sorry, but it's true.
So long, waxy friend.
Thanks for the memories.