From the mouths of my kids...
"The doctor put a noodle in my leg."
"Check out what's in my diaper!"
Me: "That looks like a spider bite."
Hubba: "Awesome! Am I gonna get super powers?!"
"Mom, I want you to stop following Satan."
"You're the best cook I've never seen!"
"So, wait... is Rocky about a sumo wrestler?"
A car slowly turns into the parking lot where we are walking. Out of nowhere, Hubba yells: "Hey, watch it, buddy!" The guy's window is down and he is amused by the tongue-lashing. He turns to his passenger and says, "I think I just got told off by a 3-year-old!" to which Hubba yells back, "I'm FIVE, you dummy!"
"Sometimes I wish people had a minimize button so I could click it and make them go away."