Of Singing and Writing and Discovering

It has happened. My baby, who is no longer a baby, is in school full-time.

I was recently re-reading a book that I love, The Running Dream. At one point in the story she talks about how the finish line in a race is really also the starting line. A beginning of something new to conquer. I've thought about that a lot.

We are down from 10 kids in the house to only 6. And when I tell people 'only six kids at home' I get why they think that's kind of funny. But to me, it's kind of sad.

My mom's cancer seems to be gone, but the doctors are cautiously optimistic. She hasn't been declared cancer free yet, but her visits to the doctors are less frequent and she's getting her energy back. So, although I can still go visit anytime I like, she is not as dependent on me for rides and care. This is a wonderful, beautiful thing.

But man, what do I do with all this free time?

I thought I had my life figured out. I have put my interpreting career on the back burner for so long, just waiting for this time in my life. I am still needed and wanted in my profession. But I have discovered it's not really what I want to do anymore. So I am torn.

I can't let go of interpreting, not yet. It's a huge part of who I am and how I feel I remain best connected to the Deaf community. I'm exploring ways to maintain that connection without needing to be an actual certified interpreter any longer, but for now I just can't let go. I just can't justify paying for hours and hours of workshops to maintain my certification when I work so little, but I do it anyway. I'm not sure what it is that keeps me tethered to this, but I'm going to figure it out, as well as figuring out some way to stay close to ASL and the Deaf community. I have some ideas, some totally outlandish, some completely doable. So I'm exploring those. And discovering more about me.

This completely new phase in my life has helped me to understand three absolutes about myself. One is that singing makes me happy. One is that the Deaf community and ASL make me happy. The other is that writing makes me happy. So I'm going to make time every day to do something with all three.

I guess this is the beginning. My new starting line.