Counting Down

I haven't been online much this past month. Have you noticed? Life has been so full!


We had our #1 favorite family reunion with Allen's parents & siblings.

We have been invited to TWO family weddings.


Coolister, ElemenoB and Thumbelina went off to do some service projects and then river rafting at Youth Conference for THREE days.

(No official photos yet... they get back today.) photo from griffithexp.com

FOUR princesses accompanied me to the local Princess Festival.


I basked in Girl's Camp for my FIFTH year as a leader.

I enjoyed a lovely backyard tea party with SIX wonderful ladies.


We found out that our sweet aunt Marie returned to heaven SEVEN days ago. Her funeral is today.


EIGHT of my kids slept...

while Princess made a card...

to go with our traditional Father's Day breakfast in bed.


Allen and the oldest two kids ran NINE legs for their team in the 188 mile Ragnar Relay.


And Little O is finally able to wear this shirt that I bought for him almost a year ago. I was worried it wouldn't fit...

...but it does! (This means that number TEN's arrival in '11 will make us a family of TWELVE.)

In short, life is good.

So, so, so wonderfully, happily, crazy-in-the-best-way, marvelously good.

Forever Is A Mighty Long Time

Some days I miss my dad a lot.

Some days, for no particular reason, I will have him on my mind all day long.

Other days something will trigger that place in my brain where all of my 'dad-memories' are stored.

In either case there is nothing much to do about it... except to remember.

When you lose someone you love to death, there is no describing the range of emotions experienced. I'm not sure I can speak for anyone else, but for me it has not gotten any easier as the years have passed. There will always be that void that only a father can fill. I will always love him and miss his physical presence in my life.

On days where I am particularly besieged with these thoughts and memories, I like to go visit his grave. There is some solace in being able to just sit there and sign to him, tell him my thoughts and feelings, disappointments and dreams. I am sure I appear to be something of a mad-woman, hands waving about in rushed thought and frenzied words as I sit at his graveside there in the cemetery, but it is my way of working through things.

When I have these days, I talk and cry and laugh and even scream until I have said my piece. And when I am done, I look down at his grave and see this:
And I am comforted. I find peace. I am so thankful to know that I will see him again someday.

I am thankful for the knowledge that death is only a temporary situation.

I am thankful that my family is a forever family.

Happy Memorial Day

We bought some of the brightest of these
And did some of this on them
Then we drove over here
And sent our messages of love to the heavens
Then watched as the sky swallowed them up.
We shared some great memories

And visited some friends.
We marveled over the beautiful landscape
Then headed back home.
It was a happy Memorial Day.

Dad

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8 years ago today you silently slipped away

in the quiet morning hours

an escape from your pain, a beginning for mine

leaving behind only memories

in mental and tangible photographs.

It unsettled me

that the world could go on turning

without you here.

Time does not make the loss easier
does not fill the empty part of me
which still longs for one final dance;
the way we used to sway when I was young
and again when your time here was ending.

Yet, hope warms my soul

and your strength embraces me

when I need to face life's storms.

In moments of silence I often reflect
on the life you lived
and the love you left with us

a priceless treasure I hold closely guarded

until the promise of forever is kept.