Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Jokes For Kids: Halloween Edition

Halloween is definitely a favorite holiday around here. That means Halloween themed jokes in lunches for October! Here are our favorites.

Q:What is the problem with twin witches?
A: You never know which witch is which.

Q: What do you call two witches that live together?
A: Broom mates.

Q: What's a witch's favorite subject in school?
A: Spelling.

Q: What did the witch do when her broom broke?
A: She witch-hiked.

Q: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A: It had no body to go with.

Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
A: No body.

Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
A: He didn't have the guts.

Q: Why can't skeletons play music in church?
A: They have no organs.

Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A: To get to the body shop.

Q: Why can't ghosts tell lies?
A: You can see right through them.

Q: What does a ghost call his mom and dad?
A: His transparents.

Q: What do you get if you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A: Bamboo.

Q: Why don't ghosts like rain?
A: It dampens their spirits.

Q: Why do ghosts like to ride elevators?
A: It raises their spirits.

Q: What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A: He is mist.

Q: What do you get if you cross a vampire with a snowman?
A: Frostbite.

Q: Why was the vampire hard to get along with?
A: He was a pain in the neck.

Q: Why did the vampire flunk art class?
A: He could only draw blood.

Q: How are vampires like false teeth?
A: They both come out at night.

Q: What's a vampire's favorite fruit?
A: A necktarine.

Q: What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?
A: Any old girl he can dig up.

Q: Why do mummies have so much trouble making friends?
A: They're all wrapped up in themselves.

Q: Why don't mummies take vacations?
A: They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.

Q: Why do mummies make excellent spies?
A: They're good at keeping things under wraps.

Q: Why is there a gate around cemeteries?
A: Because people are dying to get in.

Q: Why are graveyards noisy?
A: Because of all the coffin.

Q: How do you fix a broken jack-o-lantern?
A: With a pumpkin patch.

Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin pi.

Q: Why did the cyclops close his school?
A: He only had one pupil.

Q: Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize?
A: He was out standing in his field.

Q: What happened to the cannibal who was late for dinner?
A: They gave her the cold shoulder.

Q: Why do you always find demons and ghouls together?
A: Demons are a ghoul's best friend.

Q: Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A: Because everyone was a goblin.

Q: What happened to the guy who couldn't keep up payments to his exorcist?
A: He got repossessed.

Q: Did you hear about the zombie that lost his left arm and leg?
A: He's all right now.


Lori said...

Funny stuff, Gerb! Love the "any old girl he can dig up" one.

Kara said...

Thank you! Gonna print and put in lunches, too. Good job fun mama!