Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Jokes For Kids: Halloween Edition



Halloween is definitely a favorite holiday around here. That means Halloween themed jokes in lunches for October! Here are our favorites.

Q:What is the problem with twin witches?
A: You never know which witch is which.

Q: What do you call two witches that live together?
A: Broom mates.

Q: What's a witch's favorite subject in school?
A: Spelling.

Q: What did the witch do when her broom broke?
A: She witch-hiked.

Q: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A: It had no body to go with.

Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
A: No body.

Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
A: He didn't have the guts.

Q: Why can't skeletons play music in church?
A: They have no organs.

Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A: To get to the body shop.

Q: Why can't ghosts tell lies?
A: You can see right through them.

Q: What does a ghost call his mom and dad?
A: His transparents.

Q: What do you get if you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A: Bamboo.

Q: Why don't ghosts like rain?
A: It dampens their spirits.

Q: Why do ghosts like to ride elevators?
A: It raises their spirits.

Q: What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A: He is mist.

Q: What do you get if you cross a vampire with a snowman?
A: Frostbite.

Q: Why was the vampire hard to get along with?
A: He was a pain in the neck.

Q: Why did the vampire flunk art class?
A: He could only draw blood.

Q: How are vampires like false teeth?
A: They both come out at night.

Q: What's a vampire's favorite fruit?
A: A necktarine.

Q: What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?
A: Any old girl he can dig up.

Q: Why do mummies have so much trouble making friends?
A: They're all wrapped up in themselves.

Q: Why don't mummies take vacations?
A: They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.

Q: Why do mummies make excellent spies?
A: They're good at keeping things under wraps.

Q: Why is there a gate around cemeteries?
A: Because people are dying to get in.

Q: Why are graveyards noisy?
A: Because of all the coffin.

Q: How do you fix a broken jack-o-lantern?
A: With a pumpkin patch.

Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin pi.

Q: Why did the cyclops close his school?
A: He only had one pupil.

Q: Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize?
A: He was out standing in his field.

Q: What happened to the cannibal who was late for dinner?
A: They gave her the cold shoulder.

Q: Why do you always find demons and ghouls together?
A: Demons are a ghoul's best friend.

Q: Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A: Because everyone was a goblin.

Q: What happened to the guy who couldn't keep up payments to his exorcist?
A: He got repossessed.

Q: Did you hear about the zombie that lost his left arm and leg?
A: He's all right now.

2 comments:

Lori said...

Funny stuff, Gerb! Love the "any old girl he can dig up" one.

Kara said...

Thank you! Gonna print and put in lunches, too. Good job fun mama!