Graduation

{cue pomp and circumstance}

I am proud to announce that after 4 weeks of feeling a bit on the geriatric side:



I am still not allowed to put weight on my foot but I feel so much younger now that I'm free of my walker.

I look forward to a future date when I can happily announce that I've graduated to these:


Stay tuned!

Boys vs. Girls

(Cowgirl and Princess rode the escalator numerous times on their shopping trip)

Well, friends, the summer is almost at a close (sad, sad, sad!) and that means it's my favorite (lie, lie, lie!) time of year - time for back-to-school shopping! I take the kids in groups of 2 for my own sanity. And here is the difference I noticed between back-to-school shopping with boys and back-to-school shopping with girls (using my 4 oldest as examples):

BOYS (aka Coolister, age 16 and All-a-Boy, age 10)

Me: Hey, guys, what do you need to get before school starts?

Coolister: A pair of pants.

All-a-Boy: I don't think I need anything.

Me: You're kidding me, All-a-Boy. You don't even own a pair of pants without holes.

All-a-Boy: I can just wear shorts in the winter.

Me: No.

All-a-Boy: (rolling his eyes) Ok, a pair of pants. But I hate shopping.

(Actual shopping trip includes my choosing pants, shirts and shoes for them to try on & purchase from only 2 stores. If you don't include the time we spent perusing books (love, love, love!), we were finished in less than 2 hours.)

GIRLS (aka ElemenoB, age 14 and Thumbelina, age 13)

Me: Okay, ladies, what do you need to get before school starts?

ElemenoB: At least 2 pair of jeans, some shirts that aren't t-shirts and a belt.

Thumbelina: I need some collared shirts, some tennis shoes for P.E., some cute shoes for school and some church shoes.

ElemenoB: Yeah, if I could find some more cute shoes, that would be nice, too.

Thumbelina: Oh, and some dresses.

Me: You're going to wear church shoes and dresses to school?

Thumbelina: If they're casual and cute, yes.

ElemenoB: I also need some new mascara and some running shorts.

Thumbelina: Yeah, I need P.E. clothes, too.

(Actual shopping trip consists of their choosing items to try on - including numerous t-shirts for ElemenoB (???) - and roughly 3 items each being purchased from a total of 6 stores. Total time invested thus far is 5 hours... and we're not finished yet.)

The difference?

Boys are no-nonsense, practical and deliberate.

Girls are... not.

But I love having both. (Love, love, love!)

New Shoes!

I ran into someone I had not seen in a long time the other day. "I wish I had new shoes on!" he lamented. I grinned. I had not thought about that in a while...

Long, long ago in a place not too far from here I used to work as an American Sign Language interpreter. Every morning I would go to an elementary school and enter the classroom of a teacher who did not appear to enjoy her job. My assignment was not to jazz up the teacher's lectures in order to keep the child I was interpreting for awake... although I often wished it was.

One day, something exciting happened. Miss Teacher came into the class with a twinkle in her eye and a poster in her hand.

"Do you know what happened yesterday, children?" she asked, smiling. They all shook their heads, wondering what had caused this transformation. "I bought new shoes!" she answered, shifting her feet at different angles to show off her new purchase. "And guess what happens when we get new shoes? We say the 'New Shoes' poem!"

She turned and hung the poster she carried in the front of the room. It was decorated with all sorts of shoes she had cut out from magazines and various advertisements, and in the middle was the poem, 'Choosing Shoes'.

And I fell in love. (With the poem, silly.)

Soon after this I changed jobs and interpreted at a state college. We often had meetings that were less-than-exciting... until one day when all that changed.

"Does anyone have anything to bring up?" the boss-lady asked as the meeting began. I looked around. Everyone was doodling on paper or otherwise trying to stay awake. And then I saw them... Boss-lady had on new shoes. I raised my hand.

"I notice you have on new shoes, boss-lady!" I pointed out with all the excitement I could muster. Everyone looked. She smiled. "Yes, I do. Thank you for noticing, Gerb. Anyone else?"

I raised my hand again. "Do you know what happens when someone is wearing new shoes?" I asked. And before she could answer I stood up and said, "They get the 'New Shoes' song!"

I immediately broke into an impromptu dance, reciting the poem in a sing-songy manner directed at boss-lady. I ended with a flourish and sat down to the applause of my co-workers.

"Thank you, Gerb," boss-lady said, laughing. "Anyone else have new shoes?"

I sang for 2 more people that day and for several others since. I noticed that people often happened to buy new shoes the week of our meetings... coincidence? I think not.

How about you - got new shoes? Well, go slip them on and enjoy...

Choosing Shoes
by Frida Wolfe

New shoes, new shoes,
Red and pink and blue shoes.
Tell me, what would you choose,
If they'd let us buy?

Buckle shoes, bow shoes,
Pretty pointy-toe shoes,
Strappy, cappy low shoes;
Let's have some to try.

Bright shoes, white shoes,
Dandy-dance-by-night shoes,
Perhaps-a-little-tight shoes,
Like some? So would I.

BUT
Flat shoes, fat shoes,
Stump-along-like-that shoes,
Wipe-them-on-the-mat shoes,
That's the sort they'll buy.

Look At Me

ElemenoB and Thumbelina joined me for my bi-monthly all-day marathon grocery shopping trip last Saturday. As we were leaving the third store on our route ElemenoB made an interesting observation:

"People at the store just look at each others grocery carts when they walk past. Nobody looks at anybody's face."

I had never really thought about that before, but decided to see for myself if it was true in the next supermarket. Sure enough, not one person with a shopping cart looked at me. The more I thought about it, the more it bothered me. So I decided to do something about it at our last stop.

Let's call it an experiment in human nature.

From the time we left the car, I looked into the face of every person who passed me.

"Hello there!" I said to the cart-collector in the parking lot.

I got one of those slight-upwards-nod-of-the-head movements in return.

"Welcome to Walmart," the door-greeter said in his monotone, I-hate-my-job voice.

"Thanks! I LOVE shopping here!" I replied, which was a little bit of a lie, but it solicited a friendly half-wave as I continued walking. So I think it was worth it.

"How are you today?" I asked an older gentleman in passing in the produce section.

"Very well, thank you. You have a good day!" he replied.

This was fun.

Eye contact, smiles, and an occasional word met every shopper who passed my cart.

In frozen foods, a twenty-something scanned the Bagel Bites.

"Hi!" I called to her with a smile on my face.

She looked behind her. Nobody there. She looked back at me.

"Um, hi." she answered, closing the freezer and avoiding eye contact, as she pushed her cart past me.

No Bagel Bites today, apparently.

In the peanut butter aisle I passed a woman dressed in her Sunday best.

"I love your dress!" I exclaimed.

She looked at my cart.

"That's a lot of peanut butter."

"Yes," I replied, "I have a lot of kids and they all love peanut butter."

"Hmmm. Have a good one." she said as she continued down the aisle.

"You too!" I called after her.

In the dairy section I encountered my toughest case. Her hair was 3 shades of purple along with some of (what I assumed was) her natural brown. One colorful, glittery eye peeked out from behind her long bangs and I couldn't count all of her facial piercings. She was perusing the many varieties of yogurt.

"Hello," I said, looking her in the (one) eye.

She continued perusing. Yoplait or Dannon? Mountain Dairy or Great Value?

"I really like Mountain Dairy," I offered.

She went back to Yoplait. Ignoring me.

Should I give up? I thought to myself.

I am not a quitter.

"Have you ever tried this kind before?" I asked, holding up some Dannon.

She turned and looked me square in the eye.

She pulled her headphones out of her ears.

"Were you saying something to me?" she asked.

"Oh, I didn't realize you had headphones in," I answered, slightly embarrassed. "I was just saying hello. You know, making friendly conversation. Nothing important. Sorry to bother you."

"Hey, lady," she called to me as I walked away.

I turned. "Yeah?"

"Hello. And I like your shoes."

I looked at my shoes, then back up at her. "Thanks."

"No problem. You have a good one, ok?" she said with a smile.

"Yeah, you too." I responded.

Here I was, trying to see how others would respond to me, and this young woman's smile made my day.

Happiness can come in the most unexpected packages.

photo from personalnewtrition.com

He Ain't Got No Sole

Maybe someone can help me out here. Is it normal for a 15-year-old boy's shoes to go from this:

to this:
in 2 months?

Seriously, click on that last picture and see how destroyed they are.

And a follow-up question:
Is it normal for a teenage boy to not want to throw away shoes in this condition?
I mean, is "ghetto" the new look?

(Sorry, that was 2 questions.)

Please, enlighten me.