Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Guest Post: Cookie Dilemma

photo from threadless.com

It’s 12 o’clock. Midnight. You should be in bed, but your sweet tooth is acting up. You stumble down the hallway and into the kitchen in hopes of finding the perfect remedy, sugar. Or, more specifically, a couple of your mom’s world famous chocolate chip cookies baked only hours before. You spot the cookie jar and excitedly reach in. Your hand closes around a particularly large cookie and your mouth begins to water as its aroma reaches your nostrils. As you take the first bite, you realize just how much you love the soft, sweet dough, the rich creamy texture, and best of all, the way the choc- wait a minute- chocolate chips are not supposed to be chewy or… wrinkly. You quickly turn on the light and realize that the baked good in your hand is a raisin “cookie”.

You must now make a decision, will you A) muscle your way past the raisins and finish the so-called “cookie” B) find someone else who wouldn’t mind eating the cookie imposter or C) toss that sucka in the trash.

If your answer is A then you obviously have no idea what a good, genuine cookie tastes like. (Or you have lost the use of your taste buds at some point in your life. If that’s true, then you have my deepest sympathy.) My advice to you would be to ask your doctor what the heck your problem is and maybe even consider getting some therapy.

If your answer was B then you’re probably a nice person who has never liked to waste food due to the fact that there are starving children in Kentucky (among other places). That’s very thoughtful but I bet you there’s not a single person out there who would really want to eat that “cookie” anyway (starving or not). Of course we’ve all eaten a raisin cookie at one time or another, even I’ve gagged through one to please my grandma, but I’m talking about eating it for the pleasure, the taste, for pure enjoyment.

Now for C; if your answer was C then you and I are just possibly kindred spirits. If you answered C then you truly appreciate and understand just how wonderful or *shudder* repulsive a cookie can be. If you answered C then I want to thank you. It’s the people like you, who are sensible and have good taste, that make the world a better place.



Today's guest post comes from my eldest daughter, ElemenoB. She is 15 years old and can be found running, reading, and taking pictures - but usually not at the same time. She loves "old things" like dilapidated houses and rusty trucks because of the personality and history which they exude. She enjoys perusing Country Living magazine and Pottery Barn books. Enchiladas, Remember the Titans and Agatha Christie are also among her favorites.

20 comments:

Susan Tipton said...

I am right there with you. Raisins are not for cookies.

Btw, great writing.

Teachinfourth said...

I couldn't agree with you more. Raisins are not a welcome participant in just about any type of food.

I am all about option 'C.' I had a boss once who, at her Christmas party, had a plateful of chocolates. I was a bit apprehensive because you never quite know what you're going to get with one of those suckers.

Sensing my dilemma, she offered up the following advice, "If you don't like one you've picked, throw the rest away and try another one."

This has been a magical solution which has worked like a charm ever since…

http://teachinfourth.blogspot.com/2009/02/life-is-like.html

Rachel said...

Amen!! My baby recently was given a raison cookie. He took one bite, looked at it, and threw it down and said, "thoze chocwate chips are wotten"!

YogaSavy said...

Unless it is an oatmeal raisin and fresh out of the oven! But a chocolate chip should JUST BE a chocolate chip!

Brown Thumb Mama said...

I completely agree! Raisins are evil. We call them "paper-wrapped flies" at my house. Bleah!

diane rene said...

marvelous post!

I don't know what raisins are good for anyway. they are just rotten grapes ... rotten food deserves to be tossed!

Shannon said...

Raisins do actually have their place in the world - bread pudding, good curry dishes, and yes...the occasional cookie. I had the very same disdain for raisins when I was younger, and often substituted cranberries for them. Then I learned how to soak the raisins in various liquids such as vanilla, orange or apple juice...reconstituting them makes a huge difference.

Larry said...

I know I might be the minority, but I LOVE raisins. Oatmeal raisin cookies with LOTS of nuts and raisins make my mouth water; a peanut butter and raisin sandwich is my second favorite sandwich after PB&J; I put them in salads (and their cranberry relatives), and I like to eat a handful (plain) for a snack when they are around. Now, I do understand your disappointment when you realized that it was not your mom's chocolate chip masterpiece, but hey.... give the raisin a chance!

Richard & Natalie said...

This read like a nightmare for me. Raisins instead of chocolate, what could be worst? Raisins are not for cookies or cinnamon rolls (that's a pet peeve of mine).

Thanks for such a funny and cute post!

Richard & Natalie said...

Ok. My spelling could be "worse". Which is what I really meant. :)

Kinsey said...

Now I like raisins. I will eat them on a boat, on a plane...ya know everywhere! But not, NOT in cookies. I would probably finish the cookie if I couldn't find my dad to finish it for me :) He'll eat anything.

Sarah said...

No raisins and NO nuts for me...I think an oatmeal raisin cookie without the raisins sounds like a fast fix for an old problem.

Oh, and I have chickens, so rather than throw out the "wotten" cookie, I would share it with those creatures who have not yet evolved enough to know better.

Gina said...

Loved the post. Loved the writing. Love raisn cookies too. BUT, there is no comparison to anything chocolate.

Anaise said...

I guess I don't know better, but I like raisins in my cookies--now that I'm a grown-up. I didn't like them when I was a kid. But now oats and pecans and raisins and chocolate and vanilla are just deeeeelicious!

To each his (or her) own! :)

Broughton said...

I could not have put it any better myself!!! I am not a raisin fan and it is almost a sin putting them in a cookie!! Great post!

Corine said...

LOL - Tell Elenemobe (or what ever it is) I love her writing! ;D However... I don't think she will like me, because I LOVE homemade, oatmeal cookies... WITH RAISINS (once in a blue moon, that is ~ and with only a few raisins, but still). Oh well, such is life!

Farscaper said...

AMEN!!!

I think Rasins are a pathetic attempt to make something totally delicious and non-healthy somewhat healthy. If I'm eating a cookie... I'm eating a COOKIE!!! Sugar, Chocolate, BUTTER. There's no "nutrition" there... Just a playground for my tastebuds!!!

It's like taking a kid to the playground and wrapping them up in so much padding so they don't get hurt that they can't play. Let the child Play!! Let the tastebuds Frolic!!! FREE THE CHOCOLATE!!!

Farscaper said...

(I could use a cookie now)


(BTW... I'm reading these posts backwards... I just finished the Star Wars one. My Word Verification word right now is "VATOR". Yee Haw!)

Lori said...

I am with you, ElemenoB. Raisins do not belong in cookies, particularly if you happen to be all set on a chocolate chip cookie. Btw--fantastic writer you are, young one. The force is with you strongly. ;)

Amie said...

You are a brilliant girl. Raisins in cookies are like eating flies baked into what could have been a delicious cookie.